Things are going to take a slightly different tone in my blog. I found out yesterday from my dear friend A that she had the same thing I had two years ago, a nodule on her thyroid and it was cancerous. I remember standing on the outskirts of A and C’ life and feeling really helpless. I supported them as best I could from the sidelines, giving them some space but desperately wanting to be more useful. It was a rough time to be a friend when I didn’t know what to do or what they wanted me to do.
I joked with another friend of mine that I’m not going to turn my blog into cancer watch 2010 for me. But I am scared and I am a worrier and I’m basically a big baby. Thoughts of my own death have been on my mind since I was about 10. I’ve been living like I was dying for a long time, giving of myself to my dear friends and family whenever I could. But there are some areas I have been neglecting. As much as I’ve done…there’s still more I can do.
It’s time in my life’s journey to deal with my faith head-on. I went to a Catholics Come Home meeting last night – the first of a four-part series. I’ve had a lot of stuff brought up as a result of it, and I am going to start examining some things, here on the blog. If it helps someone, great. If not, that’s okay too.
I just need to talk about my faith and my choices and the consequences of them for a little bit.