I knew she was sensitive…but omg!

This is the conversation I had with my highly sensitive 6 year old daughter when I picked her up from her half day kindergarten at 10:40, literally 15 minutes after I left the local Borders bookstore:

K: “Why does it smell like you went to Borders?”

(I swear, I didn’t even buy coffee today, just a book, a CD and a magazine to help me on my journey to enlightenment).

Me: “Because I did”

(how the HELL did she know that by SMELLING ????)

K (crying…wailing…gnashing of teeth): “I wanted to go-o-o-o-o-o-o-o….”

Me (listening to the angelic sounds of Celtic Woman, and luckily just finished reading The Hidden Treasure of Anger article I am able to sit with her anger inside the car and not be reactionary): “Honey, I’m sorry, we’ll go another time together…want some carrots?

K (more tears and wails): “No-o-o-o-o-o-o”

Me (not saying a word, enjoying the music, thinking calm thoughts)….”How about some crackers? (teddy Grahams? chex mix?)

K (more tears and wails): “I’m not h-u-u-n-n-g-r-r-y!!!!!”

Me:  “How bout a hug?  You can come up to the front seat with me.”

K (more tears and wails): “No-o-o-o-o-o-o”

Me (deep breath….sigh).

It’s weird how 10 minutes can feel like an eternity when you are stuck in a car driving from one school to another with a wailing 6 year old. She continued for 10 more minutes while waiting for her younger sister..but it got worse when she realized she forgot to remind me to go into the school office to buy a “smencil” (a scented pencil made out of recycled newspaper they sell at school).

She refused to eat the snacks I brought…adding to her meltdowns…

But…I was calm….listening to the voice of angels….

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This entry was posted in explosive child, highly sensitive child, highly sensitive mom, my stories. Bookmark the permalink.

10 Responses to I knew she was sensitive…but omg!

  1. sally says:

    I do not think your daughter is highly sensitive, she’s just spoiled.

  2. raisingsmartgirls says:

    Sally…

    My, you are awfully judgmental for someone who does not know me and my daughter. But you have no idea what the hell you are talking about.

    This is my daughter with diagnosed with a social anxiety disorder, selective mutism, intellectually gifted, a reactive hypoglycemic and HIGHLY Sensitive.

    You can keep your unhelpful comments to yourself or I will banish you from ever speaking your peace here again.

  3. raisingsmartgirls says:

    And Sally…as I have said before…

    in this post

    https://raisingsmartgirls.wordpress.com/2009/09/18/im-tired-of-aggressive-kids-and-neglectful-parents/

    you don’t like what I have to say…you know where the door is…

    why are you still reading my blog if you don’t approve of the way I’m taking care of my children?

  4. raisingsmartgirls says:

    And anyway, what do you suggest I do?

    Spank her?

    Yell at her?

    Tell her she’s a bad child for having disappointed feelings?

    Tell her to shut up already?

    Yeah, well sister, when you have walked a mile in MY shoes, I’ll then consider taking any kind of advice from you.

    Nah…no I wouldn’t, even then.

  5. sally says:

    The only replies that you want are those that pity you or have positive reactions to your blogs. The only reason I returned to your blog was because friends of mine told me how pitiful you sound. I read some of Januarys and could not believe what I was reading. I think the only person you could ever love is yourself. Maybe the reason you don’t get along with your mom and sisters is because they tell it like it is, and you just can’t take that.

    I didn’t say to spank your daughter or any of the other things YOU SUGGESTED, I didn’t even think them, YOU DID.

    Again you can’t take negative comments. Perhaps you need to seek professional help, instead of blogging. Your way of dealing with your problems (blogging) really isn’t helping you.

    I do wish you luck in seeking out treatment. Hopefully this will not only help you but also your family.

  6. raisingsmartgirls says:

    I just wanted to share something someone wrote on THEIR own blog about me and sharing my story


    Casey is very resourceful, intelligent, and a fabulous writer. It seems like she is reading my mind because most of what she says is exactly how I feel about being a mother, both the rewards and internal struggles….

    Raising Smart Girls has tremendously helped me. Both with resources and my state of mind. Casey has given a lot of wonderful suggestions that I’m currently using and plan on using. She also makes me feel normal again, because all my thoughts about motherhood is shared by many others. It’s just not something most mothers openly share.


    The ONLY reason why I’m not citing who said this because I’m really afraid you’ll go to her blog and tell her bad things about her too.

  7. Sydsmommy says:

    This is a bit off the subject but I have a question about kindergarten. I noticed your daughter is six. My daughter also has selective mutism. She is 4 and has a late summer birthday. If I sent her to kindergarten she would be the youngest of the 5 year olds. Like your daughter she is very bright (she has an IEP for sm and mild sensory issues) and her special ed teacher told me she is advanced and already knows most of what they would teach her in kindergarten. My question is should you hold a bright child behind because of severe anxiety and emotional maturity? I’ve been struggling with this. She seems so fragile to be sent off to elementary school especially on a bus!

  8. raisingsmartgirls says:

    Sydsmommy –

    This is a very personal decision. I don’t want to sway you one way or the other, however, I do NOT regret that she had an extra year to develop emotionally.

    I struggled for a year with the decision…and worried and worried. Both wondering about insisting on early entrance – due to her advanced abilities – and keeping her out until she was 6. I didn’t have a whole lot of “choice” as she turned 5 in Sept and our state had a July cut-off. If I felt absolutely certain the SM would resolve itself by the time she was 5, I would have moved heaven and earth to to get her accommodated early. I’m really glad I didn’t.

    But, the main reason why I didn’t was this: if I couldn’t be sure she would talk out loud to her teacher, it wasn’t going to make much difference because even though she was bright (and reading by age 4.5), I knew that the reading assessments she’d have to do would be disastrous.

    So…in the end, I decided to not push the issue and took a wait and see attitude, both in how SHE would progress and how the teachers would handle her needs for challenge.

    Well, as it turned out, she progressed a lot between 4.5-5.5 that when she started kindergarten at not quite 6, she was able to read fluently out loud for the teacher. She was assessed at level 20 – which is second grade. Now, just a few months later, she is reading at a third grade level. Her teacher IS accommodating her need for challenge by teaching her not HOW to read, but how to read for comprehension.

    My daughter could probably use a bit more challenge in other areas, but she doesn’t complain too much about it.
    If she complained more…I would do something else. But for now…it seems to be okay. So far, I’m just keeping a close eye on it and working with her at home.

    If they don’t meet her needs, then I will plan on revising my plan and meeting with the teacher/school to see what can be done to further differentiate her curriculum.

    And we do stuff at home – math and science. You can see my other two blogs for ideas..

    http://theexplorationstation.wordpress.com/

    http://growinginpeace.wordpress.com/

  9. Bev says:

    I don’t usually butt into “online disagreements” but this time I couldn’t help myself. Sally…I don’t know who you are or what’s bugging you, but it seems like you have a major chip on your shoulder about something. Not many people go out of their way to be rude and judgemental unless they’ve got major insecurity/anger issues….so maybe you should try to deal with your own problems instead of bashing others. It appears you take pleasure in spouting off your mouth about things you obviously know nothing about…then dig yourself further in your “silly hole” when people (understandably) don’t take kindly to your cheap shots. I believe YOU’RE the one who needs therapy, not the other lady, so until you’ve done that…you should really keep your rude comments to yourself.

  10. raisingsmartgirls says:

    Bev –

    Thanks for the support. I haven’t heard from Ms. Sally in quite some time. I have a feeling I won’t either.

    I realized I’m just weird. I think weird stuff. I parent my daughters weirdly because I believe in understanding their needs and working with them.

    Sally’s criticism that day caused a HUGE spike in traffic, so, I guess it wasn’t all bad. Too bad I don’t have ads where I get paid per pageview because I could have made a few pennies. lol.

    At any rate, I’m doing MUCH better now. Things are overall brighter (it’s springtime and the birds and flowers and that always help things – winter in the midwest is always dreary and probably not the best time to dredge up the past), and I just found out my littlest one is going to get full day kindergarten and she’s so thrilled about it and so am I so that I can work on a little of my own goals. Life is good.

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